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Summary of the book The power of self-confidence
#1
A person must be in constant movement and development, and help himself to make decisions, and not say there is no more time, or say I am too old to make a change in my life.
One of the most important aspects of the personality that is in dire need of standing with it in order to correct its shortcomings or defects.. the part related to confidence.. because if a person lacks confidence in himself, he will not be able to achieve any achievement, and his presence in life will be of little value..
Every person has confidence in himself in a certain way, you find a person who has confidence while he talks to people or with his wife or with his children... Each of us has confidence in a certain thing.. And the person who says that he does not have complete confidence is not true, what happened is that he focused On something he lacks confidence in, then he began to circulate the matter to say: I do not have confidence in myself.. Do you know that if a person loses confidence in himself, this person will live in great fear and will feel that all people are more important than him and better than him, and will suffer from frustration and psychological aches..
Self-esteem, which is what comes before self-confidence, will be turbulent. As for the person who enjoys a certain amount of confidence, we find that he does not suffer from fear, you find his eyes with confidence and feel through his eyes that he says to you: I am confident in myself, you will never be able to affect me .. He is He is not affected by external influences or by others, because he knows where he is going, and he knows that with this confidence he can overcome his challenges, with confidence he can overcome the impossible.
You are the one who makes the impossibility exist and make it surround you. If you decide, think, plan and do, there will be no impossible. Airplanes have a thing called the cover. When the new plane climbs for the first time, the pilot must fly it at full speed and then at the lowest speed in order to know what the limits of that plane are, but humans have no limits at all.
First of all, we ask, where does self-confidence come from? And where will the self-confidence go?
We find the self-confident person moves in a certain way, and breathes in a certain way.. Whatever happens, he will win in the end.. The Japanese have a good thing, which is: whoever falls four times must stand five times.. and if he falls six times, he will stand seven times.. in order to achieve its goal. The purpose of this is to achieve your goal.. What do you have to do to achieve that goal.. You must know where you are going. And the person who thinks in a sound way will know what his goals are.. and what these goals will lead to, and when he reaches what he wants, he will see from there what is beyond.. The power of self-confidence is a huge meaning.. Just when you say self-confidence, talk comes about self-concept.. Then the images The subjectivity that will lead us to self-esteem.
← Triggers of confidence.
First, the self-concept.
Most of the problems are because the person wants the other to be like him and do as he wants. If a person tells you that you must do this to be better, this may be better for his self-concept, but it is not better for my concept..Self-concept is a word that includes your awareness, values and habits. And the meaning of things for you. When a child is born, he does not have a language in which he meets the world, the language he understands, so he first learns the word “mama and papa” and then begins to learn the names of things, and here he begins to collect the language until he goes to the world and meets him in this language .. So the self-concept includes awareness This child of the world discovers that people speak a completely different language from him, and I do not mean the difference in type. The language is Arabic or English.. Rather, the difference in the concept is in the values in the beliefs, and from here the friction appears in the art of communication because each person defends his values.. He defends His opinion..every person has things with a different meaning from others..if I talk to you about my concept, my beliefs, and the meaning of things for me and my values, all of this will be different from you, there will be friction in the art of communication, because the self-concept that includes everything about me is my relationship with myself.. my experiences ...my experiences...


Attributes of the self-concept:
1- It is acquired.
Because it comes from programming, we acquire it from the father and mother, then from school, then from friends, then from the media, ... So there is programming that happened to you, and since it is acquired, then we can change it because it is programming.
2- It is regular.
He wants to remain in the same place and does not want to move to another place, so he is defending himself. Once you have obtained the self-concept and obtained language, meaning and awareness, you enter an area called the comfort zone, or the zone of safety, meaning that everything must be in this area. And if you get out of it or make any change in your life, you will resist hard because this is different from your comfort zone. And this safety zone, I call it the danger zone, because if a person is reassured to a high degree, he will not exploit his abilities, and therefore he will enter the routine in his life, and frustrations and psychological aches will begin. He is happy like this, but internally he feels upset because everyone around him is in motion and changing, but he stopped at a certain point. If someone changed his home or work, he would feel insecure and insecure in the first period because he found himself outside the point of comfort.. For example, when you ask a person to make a decision, you by your request removed him from the comfort zone, and when he comes out of it he must come out in his own way and in his own way Not in your style, not in your own way, no one can change anyone. One of the main problems between fathers and sons is that the father wants his son to do a certain thing, and the mother wants her daughter to do a specific thing as long as the person loves and wants to do a certain thing, he will succeed in doing this thing, because each person has his own self-concept, and this concept It is extremely powerful, and this concept contains the programming of this person, but if a person does something and he is forced to do it, then this is for something outside his self-concept, outside his values, outside his beliefs and outside his goals. Therefore, I must change based on my own concept, not on the basis of someone else's concept.
3- It is dynamic.
It means that he is constantly striving to improve and reach the best, but on condition that this improvement is meaningful In his sense, he is personal and not understood by anyone else.. This is because a person grows up with his achievements, and this is the basic requirement for him and his need for money to be number 7 in the ladder of his needs.
The question now is: How do I make a change in the self-concept?
We said that the self-concept is acquired, and the question: Can the acquired thing change? Of course yes, because it was originally set by a certain person, and I can change it in a way that agrees with me. First, you have to know that the other opinion of you does not and will not indicate you, because this opinion is based on the values, system and thinking of these other people, not your own values.. Neither your thinking.. nor your understanding.. I, you and everyone are a miracle from God Almighty, so how can a person judge another person?
Second - the ideal of self.
Do not blame yourself, but calculate it and learn from your mistakes, and try to develop the positive aspects of your personality and correct the negative aspects or remove them. Every person knows himself well and the problem he faces.
The ideal contains five pillars or parts:
① The spiritual part - you have an inner ideal, you know very well what you want.
② The health part - you know what you want, what your problem is, and you know your health.
③ The personal part - you know your psychological appreciation and you know how to achieve that appreciation.
④ The professional part - you know in which areas you will achieve success.
⑤ The physical part - learn where you want to go on your own.
There are some people who know well what they want, but they do not know how to reach what they want, and because these people cannot reach their goal first, they try to reach, so they start comparing them with others, and this comparison will result in blame, they will blame their luck and blame people. When a person does not reach what he wants, he will reach the stages of frustration, anxiety, tension and depression, all because the person does not know how to reach a specific thing inside him that he wants to reach.
In addition, he sees people around him who can reach this thing, so he starts to compare and then blames himself, and in the end he will criticize and beware of falling into these things because if you start with them, you will have reached a big problem.
The big problem starts with three basic things:
① comparison. ② criticism. ③ blame.
I wonder, is it right for a person to blame himself?
Do not blame yourself, but calculate it, learn from your mistakes, and try to develop the positive aspects of your personality, and correct or eliminate the negative aspects.

Third - self-image.
A person cannot judge another that he is a failure, that he is strong, or that he is weak through his outward appearance. Every human has a picture of everything. We have two eyes with which we see the outside world. If you look in the mirror, you will see only external things and you will not be able to see the internal things in your body, even though these internal organs are the real world that represents more than 90% of your abilities.. You will not You can see your energy.. you will not be able to see your liver or your heart.. you will not be able to see your mental abilities such as your intelligence.. or your patience.. or your inner love.. but you will see your outward appearance, so how can you judge a person that he is a failure or that he is strong or Is it weak from the outside??
What happens in the self-image is that between your eyes there is a third eye. This eye goes inside you to see your internal image that you drew about yourself a while ago, and this internal image does not exist except in the brain only.

Fourth - self-assessment.
A person must accept himself as he sees it and love himself as he is.
Self-esteem is also a very dangerous thing, and self-esteem means the way you see yourself, meaning your feelings and feelings about yourself. Self-esteem is your appreciation of yourself and your feeling that you are satisfied with yourself, and do you love yourself and in it we say that a person must love himself and love himself...
Some will say what this is. Self-love means selfishness.. Of course, this concept is wrong.. Self-love means that you accept yourself as it is, and that you say to God Almighty, I accept the gift you gave me as it is.. A person must accept himself as he sees it. He loves himself the way he is.
The lack of self-acceptance leads a person to two very dangerous things:
The first is negative behaviour.
The second thing - weak personality and social fear.

Fifthly - personal achievements.
Focusing on your goals gives you achievement and mental energy, and the more flexible you are, the more you avoid negative feelings.
After the self-concept, then the self-ideal, then the self-image, and then the appreciation comes the self-accomplishment. Every person wants to have an achievement, and anyone who suffers from depression feels that he has no achievements. If you ask yourself, what do I want? It takes you to the future, and why would you want it? Gives you the reasons that push you to achieve the goal, and when you want it? You take the time factor into account, and how do I get it? It gives you possibilities and means, and when you say "I can achieve the goal" you strengthen your self-confidence.

← Physiology of trust.
There is something in the body called the physiology of confidence, so we find a person who is confident in himself has a laugh that is different from others, even his breathing and his movements have a different shape from others.. his inner thinking is different from the thinking of others.
The first thing you have to do is change the physiology of your body, because if the body changes, then the thinking will change, and when the thinking changes, the body will change. If one of the two changes, the second changes automatically because the two are linked to each other.. Then you have to reach the stage of inner confidence and use telepathy with human energy. And regain your confidence.

So, one of the very important things for a person who wants to have confidence in himself is that he must think first and then start work. Simple changes in his life.. Changes that make him leave the area of safety and comfort.. He moves from the place he does not like, and immediately moves to the place he wants. To be in it.. He goes to a place he really wishes to be in. With patience and trust in God, you can achieve your goals. Accept yourself completely, no matter what the challenges and circumstances are, you are not your behavior, your challenges, nor your feelings, all of this is an activity. All of these are life activities and reactions to them. Have an inner self-image as you achieve your goals, and be confident in yourself and your limitless abilities.
Learn the strategies that help you use your abilities, thus strengthening your belief in your abilities, capabilities, ideas and goals.
Direct all your energy to God Almighty, love him and his greatness, seek help from him and rely on him, be sincere and perfect your work, you will be happy in this world and in the hereafter.
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